Dear Finley,

The last three weeks (3???) have been a blur. In most ways it has been a terrifying time- so much unknown and unseen that we can’t control. We aren’t able to hug or be near anyone else but each other (and of course Riley Pug). We are isolated on our little “island”.

But….even with all of that happening….I love every day with you. I love not having to rush off to work each day- waking and loading you hurriedly in the car…and then seeing you again late in the evening, when we are both the most tired and at our crankiest. Only to say goodnight, and get ready for the next morning to do it again. I love living a temporary life of something I’ve always wanted to give you and myself- the opportunity to be at home with you full-time. Even if it means I’m still also living the life of carrying work responsibilities and all that entails.

I love these slower mornings. Getting coffee, turning on my computer to begin work, and listening for you to slowly wake up from the next room. I love getting the chance to do virtual dance or exercise classes with you mid morning to get out some energy- both of us trying our hardest to keep up with the music. I love having “Zoom” meetings with coworkers in the early afternoons, only to have you pop in and make everyone smile. I love “working” side by side with you. As you explore your games and I try to do what I can.

Little one, I love getting you lunch, and having routines throughout the day- day after day. As hard as it is, as lonely sometimes as it is- separated from those we love during this scary time- I will always, always cherish these moments together. Days we can bake cookies in the afternoon, have an early dinner, take a bath every night because we still have energy, and then cuddling until it’s time for bed. And going to bed at night, knowing I have tomorrow to spend with you.

Today, as we blew bubbles at 2pm on a Tuesday afternoon- I looked at you and my heart swelled with love and felt in that moment- even with all the dysfunction and pain in the world, as well as my bone-aching exhaustion from trying to keep up with you and work all at the same time- it was still a wonderful day.

Little one- any day spent with you, is a day that is precious.

Love you always,

Momma